FREEDOM FROM SHAME
I had an interesting conversation recently. After explaining to a couple, unfamiliar with Standing Stone, that we care for pastors, missionaries, and other ministry leaders, the husband asked, “What does care mean? Do you just have coffee with pastors and talk with them?”
What an excellent question!
While some of our care may include coffee and most often does include talking, Standing Stone shepherds care in far more ways than that. Over the next few weeks, our Friday emails will highlight some of the unique ways that we care for ministry leaders. Today I’d like to address a tough topic: guiding Kingdom leaders into ministry healthy and out of addiction.
Recent statistics from Barna and Pastors.com reveal that 68% of churchgoing men and 50% of pastors view p*rnography regularly. I don’t share this statistic for shock value. I share it because some of our Standing Stone shepherds feel a specific call to care for ministry leaders trapped in the shame of this addiction. In Jesus, there is hope and there is freedom! One of our shepherds recently shared this story of ongoing victory with us:
I distinctly remember the day I sent off the email to Standing Stone. A friend of mine had recommended the ministry to me, saying that his experience with Standing Stone had helped him to recognize and address the underlying issues of his addiction. In what felt like a Hail Mary, I typed a simple email and hit send.
At the time, it felt like a new low. I had fought and seemingly lost a battle with pornography addiction since I was eleven years old, and here I was, sending an email to a total stranger, admitting that I couldn’t fix it. Everything else I had tried had led me back to the same spot, the same cycle.
I needed help outside myself.
What I didn’t realize in that moment was that my apparent “low” was perhaps the healthiest, best place I could possibly be. Within a few days, Standing Stone had connected me with a shepherd, who along with walking alongside me every single day, connected me with a fellowship of brothers in recovery.
For the first time, truly, in my entire life, I could be fully open and honest about the shame, pain and destruction my addiction had caused. For the first time I had people in my life who knew exactly what the throes of addiction looked like and temptations that filled it. For the first time I had someone walk through the mess with me, on a daily basis, and point me back to the redemptive work of Christ. I am incredibly grateful for my Standing Stone shepherd. He continues to walk alongside me daily, meeting me with grace upon grace and healthy challenge and conviction.
A portion of Scripture that has often come to mind throughout this nearly 2-year journey of recovery is from John 1:5, “The light shines in the darkness, and the darkness can never put it out.” Through recovery, I feel that the light of the redemptive Gospel of Christ is finally shining into the darkness that I tried to keep hidden for so long. It’s not a perfect road. As we often say, it is progress rather than perfection. But the beautiful thing about light is that when you expose darkness to it, the Light always wins.
With my Standing Stone shepherd, recovery has reacquainted me with the wondrous love of our great King. It has steadily chipped away at the shame and guilt that seemed to cloud my identity as a forgiven child. For the first time since I was eleven years old, I have true hope. Hope that addiction isn’t the end of the story. Hope that freedom is possible and here now. Hope – true and unfettered confidence – that the light wins.
Thank you for supporting my Standing Stone shepherd, through prayer, finances and more, allowing him to bring the light into my life and so many others.
In Christ,
Anonymous
Weekly Encouragement
At Standing Stone, instead of closing our eyes to the darkness of sin within, we want to wage war. We want ministry leaders to live in the light because God has called us out of darkness and into his marvelous light (1 Peter 2:9). This is his call on your heart, too. But God is not merely content to dole out light as a quantity to be used up, nor will he stand to be “a” light amongst others. Jesus proclaims,
I Am the Light of the World. Whoever follows me will never walk in darkness, but will have the light of life.
John 8:12
Jesus is the universal Light to everyone, of everything. Apart from Him, there is no light. Even the sun takes its cues from the Light of the World! Whether you’re a ministry leader or mother, CEO or feel like the lowest employee on the totem pole, to embrace Jesus and know who we are in him, we must courageously acknowledge and fight sin within us.
Sin keeps us from the Light of Life. It destroys our ability to see, blinding us to the Truth. It keeps us stuck in pits of despair or disobedience. It deceives, drives doubt deep within, deforms our desires, divides us from love and freedom, and distracts us from the abundant life Christ died to give us.
Fortunately, though sin wields these powers, we can forever “thank God! He gives us victory over sin and death through our Lord Jesus Christ” (1 Corinthians 15:57, NLT). We are not alone in the war against sin; the battle is the Lord’s, and he fights fiercely on our behalf. My end is secure, and so is yours: we never again have to walk in darkness; the Light of Life is ours for all eternity. Can I get an amen?!
